I have mostly avoided exposure to rejection. I suspected my heart wasn’t tough enough to hear the phrase: “You’re not right for us.” And so, I usually stopped short of pursuing anything of interest where the word “no” would be used repeatedly.
See: ballet, modeling, acting, academics and applying to law school.
I don’t regret not going after these things, in the end.
But, writing. I do love it. Is it the community or the writing or the community or the writing? In the end, I’m not sure. What I do know to be true is blogging is FILLED with rejection.
I entered several blogging contests lately. The form rejection letters have all officially arrived. Is this a surprise? No. It really, really is not. What would be more surprising is if I actually did win anything. Lord knows I won’t win any grammar contests anytime soon.
But I guess I have infertility to “thank” for pursuing writing, something I was always afraid to try.
Infertility was a reminder to me that sometimes, rejection is not a choice: it’s an answer. Things we all assume will happen for us, things virtually guaranteed in our Constitution (for is not the American Dream the house/family equation?) are not, in fact, possible for some of us.
One thing I love about Silicon Valley is that failure is often respected. VCs are willing to bet on losers. These entrepreneurs may not win the next time, but the experience of failing can lead them to win, eventually.
And so, today I failed. Tomorrow I will fail. I will fail a lot more than I will win, whether in parenting or writing.
But, I’m tougher now. I’m more willing to fail.
Are you afraid to fail? Has it kept you from doing things you want to do?