Mom, please skip this one. Lots of swearing, ahoy. Please go back to your Downton DVDs. You WILL love that show. I promise!
I think the real title of this post should be “Bitch, please.” Because I know I suck for all of the below bird shit. BE FOREWARNED TURN BACK!!!
I always forget the name of this monthly blogging thing. But I need it. There’s nothing that makes me feel more in control than a deadline. Nothing makes me feel more powerful or successful or rad than achieving some G Dammit results.
Which I never fucking achieve. Everything is day-to-day Sisyphean. Cleaning poo. Doing laundry. Picking up. Dropping off. Cleaning poo. Saying No. Saying Yes. Getting told everywhere and by everyone that what I do sucks. Not sleeping. Getting every virus in the county. Did I say cleaning poo? Making five different meals (ten, really) for the pickiest, most demanding four year olds in the universe. Yes, I know karma is a bitch, since I was/am the world’s pickiest eater. Yes, I know I’m lucky. I really, really do. I am so grateful for my children, they are so wonderful. They are everything.
But I eat not just kale and drink too much coffee/Jamba Juice to stay awake. To stay alive. I’m becoming that frumpy person. And I don’t have a lot of qualities other than my once-attractive facade.
Truth is, I’m
lazy uh, not motivated on my own. What do they call that again? Not self-paced? I always did my best work when some other boss or person was expecting me to jump over some yardstick. I have been productive as hell for over fifteen years.
How high? Was my mantra. I always exceeded that yardstick. I DID SERIOUSLY!
I realize that I NEED some accountability. I need some structure. I need the NAPLOMOFUGOMGWTF whatever it’s called. And I happen to know that the lady in charge is RAD.
So. Here I am.
A Post A DAY. Yes, I picked the shortest month of the year. Yes, that was DELIBERATE.
Feel free to skip my posts for a month. I will try to keep the self-indulging whining to a minimum.
In the immortal words of Western Career College,
“You can do it! WOW!”
Does anyone else, other than Esperanza’s partner, love The Beach Boys AND Radiohead? No? Of course not?
Well, here’s this song.
I’ve only listened to it 17 times today. Yes, I love snobby depressive-rock. Judge away. Lord knows, I do.