I AM DOING NAPLOMOBLOGWHATEVERLONGESTWEIRDESTINITIALSEVER

Mom, please skip this one. Lots of swearing, ahoy. Please go back to your Downton DVDs. You WILL love that show. I promise!

I think the real title of this post should be “Bitch, please.” Because I know I suck for all of the below bird shit. BE FOREWARNED TURN BACK!!!

NO? Seriously?

OK, then.

I always forget the name of this monthly blogging thing. But I need it. There’s nothing that makes me feel more in control than a deadline. Nothing makes me feel more powerful or successful or rad than achieving some G Dammit results.

Which I never fucking achieve. Everything is day-to-day Sisyphean. Cleaning poo. Doing laundry. Picking up. Dropping off. Cleaning poo. Saying No. Saying Yes. Getting told everywhere and by everyone that what I do sucks. Not sleeping. Getting every virus in the county. Did I say cleaning poo? Making five different meals (ten, really) for the pickiest, most demanding four year olds in the universe. Yes, I know karma is a bitch, since I was/am the world’s pickiest eater. Yes, I know I’m lucky. I really, really do. I am so grateful for my children, they are so wonderful. They are everything.

But I eat not just kale and drink too much coffee/Jamba Juice to stay awake. To stay alive. I’m becoming that frumpy person. And I don’t have a lot of qualities other than my once-attractive facade.

Before

After

Truth is, I’m lazy uh, not motivated on my own. What do they call that again? Not self-paced? I always did my best work when some other boss or person was expecting me to jump over some yardstick. I have been productive as hell for over fifteen years.

How high? Was my mantra. I always exceeded that yardstick. I DID SERIOUSLY!

I realize that I NEED some accountability. I need some structure. I need the NAPLOMOFUGOMGWTF whatever it’s called. And I happen to know that the lady in charge is RAD.

So. Here I am.

A Post A DAY. Yes, I picked the shortest month of the year. Yes, that was DELIBERATE.

Feel free to skip my posts for a month. I will try to keep the self-indulging whining to a minimum.

In the immortal words of Western Career College,

“You can do it! WOW!”

Does anyone else, other than Esperanza’s partner, love The Beach Boys AND Radiohead? No? Of course not?

Well, here’s this song.

I’ve only listened to it 17 times today. Yes, I love snobby depressive-rock. Judge away. Lord knows, I do.

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12 Comments

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12 responses to “I AM DOING NAPLOMOBLOGWHATEVERLONGESTWEIRDESTINITIALSEVER

  1. First of all, Sisyphean=one of the best words ever.

    Second, I know I’ve been a piss-poor commenter lately, but I love reading your posts, and one every day? Awesome!!

    Lastly, that is so me too. I can be more productive than anyone when someone else thinks I can’t. But if I only have me to compete with, it’s like, why bother?

  2. Esperanza

    YES! DO IT! DO NAPLOSHOBLOW!!!! IT WILL BE EPIC!

    Also, you are just as awesome now as you were then. Maybe even more so. Not that I knew you then but I would bet a lot of money that I’m right on this one… 🙂

    I hope this is a good experience for you. I think it will be.

    I BELIEVE IN YOU!!!!!

  3. You got me curious enough to check out that nablothingy, sounds like an interesting challenge. And you are not alone in having a hard time motivate yourself. I’m just the same. Sometimes even when I do have a deadline, so things are often done in the last minute. Good luck, I will be reading along.

  4. You. Are. Awesome. Seriously! I love your posts and can’t wait to see what you come up with for NaBloPoMo. I did it in November and had a lot of fun. Hopefully posting every day won’t feel too Sisyphean 🙂

  5. Mel

    Dude, you’re in my Google Reader, so I’m totally going to know if you skip a day. And yell at you. I will totally yell at you. So drop and GIVE ME 20!

  6. hey, while you did pick up the shortest month, you also did pick up the longest leap-year February – so Kudos on that!
    I like Radiohead sometimes, depending on my mood.
    Looking forward to your blogging!

  7. I like Radiohead and the Beach Boys, just for the record. I also like snobby depressive-rock. (ahem. see: Radiohead)

    YAY FOR YOU! I’m so excited I get to read you every day. I’ll totally hold you accountable. I’ll see Mel’s 20 and raise it to 40! 😉

  8. I’m the same way and need deadlines or I’d be on the couch watching bad tv for most of my life ;). I’m so jealous of self-motivated people!

    Good luck with NaMaBlowhatsitsname!

  9. Looking forward to your daily posts 🙂 Good luck with the NaPo-thingie!
    I’m also one of those people who do much better with deadlines, though I want to believe that I’ve gotten much better…. at least at work.

  10. I’m laughing at Mel’s comment.

    And just here after reading Keiko’s blog, which is making me feel like a friggin’ SLOTH. And I only have ONE little being to clean poo for. So huzzah, here’s to external motivators for productivity! Remember, you are RAD. And I can’t wait to READ what you’ve got to say.

  11. Self-moti-what-now? I absolutely need external motivation and/or pressure to get through my life. Usually at the very last minute. I think this is a great idea! And the shortest month just makes it more do-able.

  12. Good luck with posting every day! I haven’t built up the courage yet to try it. Maybe next month.

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